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Feeling lonely? Simple 5-3-1 rule could help you make more connections

18 Jan 2026 By foxnews

Feeling lonely? Simple 5-3-1 rule could help you make more connections

Social connection is known to be a key factor in overall health and well-being.

About one in six people worldwide experience loneliness, which is linked to around 871,000 deaths annually due to impacts on health, according to the World Health Organization.

One approach gaining attention is the 5-3-1 rule, a simple framework designed to help people build and maintain social relationships in everyday life.

ONE TOXIC BEHAVIOR KILLS RELATIONSHIPS, LEADING HAPPINESS EXPERT WARNS

The rule was reportedly developed by Canadian sociologist Kasley Killam, who argues that social health should be treated with the same consistency as physical or mental health.

"We need to be intentional about connection, just like we are with exercise and eating healthy foods," Killam recently told Business Insider.

The 5-3-1 rule encourages social connection with three clear targets, as listed below.

5: Each week, spend time with five different people or social groups, such as friends, family members, coworkers, neighbors or acquaintances.

3: Each month, have three deeper conversations with people you trust, where interactions go beyond small talk.

1: Each day, aim for about one hour of social interaction, even if that time is spread out across shorter moments.

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The goal is to encourage regular, intentional connection.

Jess Diller Kovler, a New York-based psychologist with Well By Messer and the Cognitive Therapy Center of Manhattan, said frameworks like the 5-3-1 rule are especially relevant right now.

"We need this now, more than ever," Kovler told Fox News Digital.

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She pointed out that many people underestimate how isolated they are, as modern communications, such as texting or social media, cannot fully substitute for face-to-face interaction.

The framework is meant to serve as a guideline, not something that needs to be followed perfectly, Kovler noted.

"Whether it's 5-3-1 or 1-2-3 or 1-3-5 doesn't matter. Anything beats zero-zero-zero," she said.

TEST YOURSELF WITH OUR LATEST LIFESTYLE QUIZ

Jonathan Alpert, a New York-based psychotherapist and author of "Therapy Nation," told Fox News Digital that building stronger social connections often starts with small, consistent steps rather than dramatic changes.

Alpert suggested choosing activities that create familiarity over time. "Join a class, volunteer, or show up regularly at the same gym or café. Familiarity builds comfort, and comfort builds relationships," he said.

The expert also encouraged people to be more proactive

"Instead of waiting for others to reach out, send the first text. Suggest the coffee. Most people want more connection, but don't know how to start."

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